Those Who Didn't Have to Be

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*Originally Posted June 2009

Today is a holiday which means every blog on the block is posting about Fathers Day. With someone who didn't have much in the way of male role-models growing up, Father's Day is a little confusing. I've never really celebrated it much to be honest.

My Dad and I don't have the closest relationship. In fact, we haven't spoken in years. Who knows if that will change.

In the meantime . . .


I have other father figures in my life today.

This is my uncle, and when I was ten years old, he was the only father I had. Separated from his own children from a previous marriage, it was certainly not his decision or plan to have his wife's orphaned niece move into the bedroom that should have belonged to his daughter.

To say that we didn't get a long when I was young, would be quite an understatement. I had been let down by men, so I refused to reach out. There were moments in time that I remember very vividly though. Spending school nights on the couch watching Wrestling every Monday and Thursday, cheering beside him and feeling like "one of the boys".

We get along very well now, and he's become an inspiration to me having turned his health around recently, losing plenty of weight and taking charge of his life.

As a teenager I had very little in the way of fathers. I didn't have the blessing that many other Mormon kids had: priesthood. So when Andy came home fresh of a mission, he was who I sought out for advice, spiritual guidance and blessings.

Andy is Matt's brother, but filled a role in my life that should have belonged to a Dad. Andy also has children, and has showed by example how a father leads his family, treats his wife, and loves his children.

Even during the times when we were teenagers and Matt and I would break-up (for a few weeks), Dad never turned me away. I was never his 'son's girlfriend'. I was 'daughter' nearly from day one. Shared laughter, father's blessings, and the often occasional borrowed $20 for a tank of gas was done through him. He showed me hard work. He showed me how to sleep in church and make it look like praying (LOL), and certainly how to poke fun at myself.


Then there's this man  . . .

The man who let my four year old niece dance on his feet at our wedding.

The man who can have a tickle fight with a 2 year old that lasts over an hour.

The man who can talk to a 3 year old on the phone for more than 20 minutes without getting bored.

The man who sneaks candy, soda, and everything else that parents don't allow.

The man who buys noise making toys, because to kids, those are the best kind.

The man who will one day be called "Daddy" in our house.

The father of my future children.

Happy Father's Day to You All!