Save the Drama for Yo Momma!

I've been the peacemaker my whole life. In elementary school I let my best friend punch me in the eye because the thought of fighting her made me sad. I didn't even know why she was angry (aside from the fact that her new popular friends didn't like me). In middle school I was threatened on a constant basis by other girls just because I was white, had red hair, or happened to borrow a pencil from a guy someone else liked.

Even into adulthood I've been the peacemaker. I've been the person who will go out of her way to help others resolve a feud. I've been the person that keeps their mouth shut despite anger. I've done the same thing with my family members.

Despite my love for her, my little sister was a pain in the ass growing up. She was snotty and talked back a lot. But we never fought. Not once. I threatened her a few times, once causing her to lock herself in her bedroom for over three hours while I tried to pick the lock. But nothing ever happened. We never fought. And that's because I knew what the stress would do to our family. It just wasn't worth it.

I've allowed myself to be attacked a lot growing up. I never stood up for myself. I allowed my friends to call me "fat" in High School when I was half the size I am now. Because they thought it was funny, and telling them how I really felt would just cause drama.

I hate drama.

Girls are nothing but drama. I ache for my older sister who has 4 daughters!

So today was an odd day. As you all know, I was recently selected to be a part of a weight loss competition. A competition created by one of my best friends. 5 others were selected in addition to myself as well as the two creators of the competition (one of whom has publicly announced that if she actually wins it, she will be donating her prize to someone who is trying to lose weight outside the official game). And yet today, they have been attacked by some of the people who were not chosen. They've been accused of picking contestants due to religion, connections, and even something as simple as having had their blogs designed by one of the creators.

It feels like watching an episode of Biggest Loser.

I hate drama.

There are a few things I absolutely love about this competition I am in:

• I have no idea what the prize is. They haven't announced yet. I could be competing for a granola bar right now, and guess what? It doesn't matter to me. Because my prize will be losing weight, gaining years on my life and hopefully, the ability to get pregnant.
• There are no eliminations. Elimination shows stress me out. It forces people who are sometimes friends to turn against one another when in reality, as people (and especially women) we should be lifting one another up as high as we can. We have the world tearing us down too often, and us big girls especially, allow it to happen all too often because we already have low self worth.
• There will not be one winner. There will be two winners. One who has lost the most weight. One who has physically changed the most. And even a winner who isn't a part of the official contest! Not to mention, in May when my group is done with our 8 week challenge, it starts all over again. New participants, new prizes, new lives being changed for the better!

One of my best friends wasn't chosen to be a part of the official "game", and she has been nothing but supportive of me. And I am supportive of her. I'm supportive of the girls I'm competing against, though we joke about sending one another boxes of donuts. I'm supportive of the girls who didn't make it into the "game" this round, because so many are doing it anyways and are going to change their lives. Hell, I'm even supportive of all the girls who are currently bashing my friends - though it pisses me off that they've chosen to be mean about it.

I support them because they are women, and they all have their own story. Some may be suffering from diseases and need to lose weight to save their lives. Some may have finally reached their breaking point and are now taking the chance to stand up and say, "I deserve to love myself!" And some, like me, may be working their hardest, physically and emotionally, through this journey in order to bring balance to their lives, health to their hearts, and a complete circle in their family.

This is what helps ease the drama. 

Lives will be changed for the better. 

I've been walked on for much of my whole life. Keeping my mouth shut when I should have spoken up. Keeping low when I should have stood tall.

And turning away when I could have easily looked myself in the mirror to say, "I deserve better!"

God bless everyone who is taking their own journey through life. I hope they are blessed with the knowledge of how to be safely guided to their own individual weight loss and health changes. I hope they make significant achievements in their journey and become inspiration for others to make similar changes in their lives.

And I hope that we can all aim high without needing to step on others to reach our goals.



Image: djcodrin / FreeDigitalPhotos.net