Do stalkers give you their location? That's not very stalker-ish. Isn't the point of stalking to be all secret like about it? Or is that just peeping toms and ninjas? Here was my reply:
Dear Potential Stalker,
Would you say you're my stalker? Cause that would be awesome. I'd love to have my own blog stalker. You should check out my other blogs too. Then you'll be a much more efficient.
- Untypically Jia
They were way ahead of me.
Dear Untypically Jia,
Oh I am totally your stalker. I've been your stalker for like, months. There was this one time when all I did for 3 days was sit and read your back entries on your blog. I've built a shrine of Jia in my closet out of bubblegum. Your blog entries are pasted all over the walls and I got one of your friends to send me some of your hair which I keep in a vacuum sealed bag on a red velvet pillow with its own special light shining down on it.
Perhaps I have gone too far?
Naw.
- Stalker
Dear Stalker,
Is the bubble gum previously chewed?
Can I have some of it?
Untypically Jia
Featured at: Writers Workshop
11 comments:
Who is this stalker? I wish it were me.
I'm open to multiple stalkers.
lol great laugh! And thank you I needed it!!
That is sooo funny!! I loved this!
Ha! Did you see the valentine's episode of 30rock where Jenna was upset that her stalker quit?
Hey, I'm in Utah too! Would you mind meeting up with TWO stalkers at once? LOL. I love this entry- it's hilarious and I'm now following. I found you through mama kat!
ROFL!!!
Sorry, not much more I can say, this was just too funny not to comment!
I think it should be a convention. I'll come to Utah and all my stalkers can throw me a party (or possibly kill me and wear my skin). It'll be the Non-Casual Blogger Conference. LMAO!
Darn straight! And let me just say to any other potential stalkers out there, I AM THE ORIGINAL JIA STALKER. DON'T MESS WITH ME or I will make a VOODOO doll of you and poke pins in it. Or feed it lots of cookies so you get really fat. Or something else that is both clever and evil.
-Kris THE AWESOME STALKER OF THE EVEN AWESOMER JIA (want to see the bubblegum shrine?)
Indeed y'all - Kris is my stalker.
Do I get cookies?
Hilarious! I think we all are secretly flattered by our stalkers. Well, maybe you're a little more publicly flattered..
Post a Comment