Change is in Me . . . Somewhere

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It's a very rare thing for me to write anything serious. I am not - by nature - a very serious person. I'm the type of person that likes to try and find the humor in all things, and I do mean all things. I am the type of person that understands how emotions work. The type of person who throws on a sad movie in an attempt to forcefully cry because it's just been too long and tears need to come out. I'm also the type of person who will then laugh about it later.

I am also in no way, shape or form, a very profound person. I have thoughts of course, that can come out sounding profound, but it's very possible that they are the ramblings of a late night with too much sugar and too little sleep, or the ideas sprouted by reading, watching, or listening to another - more profound - person.

But sometimes, I can have insights to things.

Sometimes I can see through the veil at the big picture of it all. Life, the world, God, meaning, purpose, destiny...

Sometimes, I know when change is needed. When things must be done in order to make change. How to go about changing.. now that is something that is beyond me.

Most of our things have been moved over from Matt's parents home, and the two of us settled into our new life together. Finally adults, though we've been married five years. Finally on our own. Hopefully for good. Living in the city instead of the small-ish suburban area where we grew up, went to high school, met, fell in love, broke hearts, died a little and found healing through family, friends, eachother and God.

We're in the big city now. Where there is less family. Where there are more friends. Where we still have eachother. And God still lives.

So where does the change come in? Is it little things like deciding to organize life, remembering to pray every night before bed, or going to the gym - which is now less than 100 feet from my door? Or is it big things? Life changing events. Career moves. Starting a family. Actually sitting down everyday to write the countless books I have stuck somewhere inside my head.

Maybe both.

Maybe one leads to the other.

Maybe I've had too much sugar and too little sleep.